How To Dominate A Woman In Bed Like A PRO

Learning to dominate a woman in bed is not an easy task. But you know that already if you’re reading this post!

You might want to learn how to properly dominate a woman because your partner said she’s into that stuff…

… Or simply because you want to express your dominant side.

Either way, you’re in the right place!

Today, we’ll talk about what it means to be dominant, what are different dominance levels, and how to dominate a woman properly. 

So, let’s jump right in!

What Does It Mean To Be Sexually Dominant?

A lot of men think that being dominant is all about giving orders, not asking your partner’s opinions, and just doing what you think is right. 

But that’s not quite right…

Being sexually dominant means that you’re the one who’s taking power away from your partner in order to please her. 

Yes, you might choke her, slap her and manhandle her, but in reality, it’s all in order to turn her on and fulfill her desires. 

As well as yours, of course. A good sexual experience is a two-way street. 

Why Would A Woman Want To Submit?

Some men might be wondering:

Why would a woman want to be dominated by a man in bed if she seeks equality in the day-to-day life!?

And the answer to this is quite simple:

Because when you’re taking control of the woman in bed, she can fully relax and enjoy the experience. 

You’re taking responsibility for the quality of the sexual act because you love and respect your partner. 

While it might look like degrading your partner with dirty talk and inflicting physical pain on purpose is mean, it’s actually quite the opposite. 

All of that, if mutually desired and agreed on, can be done with respect, love, trust, and not disgust or some other emotion.

That’s where the term power paradox comes into play.

While you are the one taking charge and dominating your partner, she ultimately has the power.

How so?

Well, because she draws the line at what behavior is acceptable and what you’re allowed and not allowed to do to her. And those limits should be always respected.

Do you see how the power dynamics actually work here?

Things To Keep In Mind Before Dominating A Woman

Now, before we get to the best bit on how to dominate women like a pro, let’s discuss a few important things you should remember:

Not All Women Are The Same

This applies more to men who want to learn to dominate a woman but don’t have one regular partner. 

Not all women are the same, and they all might want different domination experiences. 

Some might prefer to only be lightly dominated. Some might want to be bratty and challenge your power.

Other women might want some old-school hardcore domination where you grab her and fuck her till she’s screaming. 

So, if you’re having sex with different women, it’s best to find out what do they like before you try to dominate them.

Honesty Is The Key

It’s always important, to be honest with your partner. 

But like, deadly honest… 

Share your thoughts, fantasies, and even concerns with your partner and hear her out. 

Make sure you’re on the same page about your sexual preferences and desires and that you’re both being very honest with each other. 

I know that honesty might scare you, and you might think that if you give away your deepest desires, your partner will never look at you the same. 

It is important to understand that sometimes fantasies are just what it is, and not all of them are meant to come to life. 

Now, of course, not all of your desires will match, and you’ll have to adjust them to both of your limits. 

Clear communication upfront is crucial for both of you to be able to dive into your dynamic. 

And it also leads me to my other point…

It’s Better To Be Safe Than Sorry

During the sexual activity when you’re dominating your woman, always remember that it’s better to stay on the safer side and not cross the line. 

It’s not always possible to discuss every scenario, but if you’re not sure if your partner will like something, better leave it for the next time. 

You don’t want to hurt your partner or push her too far during sex, or she’ll never want you to dominate her. 

It’s going to be a bad experience for her and you. 

The same goes for listening and watching your partner’s reactions while you’re dominating her. 

If she says the safe word, stop and don’t get back to the activity, let her rest and relax. 

Or if you see that she’s showing signs of anxiety and distress, stop and ask if she’s OK. 

Communicate with her and be reactive to her expressions. You’re dominating her because you love and respect her, so always keep that in mind. 

3 Levels Of Male Dominance

And now, gentlemen, let’s get to the juicy part of this post:

Best ways to dominate your girl and how to do it right!

You should know that generally speaking, there are three different intensity levels for dominance.

Light Dominance

Let’s start with some vanilla, light domination tips:

#1: Rough Kissing

Easy start, right?!

But really, show her that you’re in control by kissing her mouth roughly, grab her by her chin, and kiss her like you can’t get enough. 

#2: Pull Her Hair

Run your fingers through her hair and pull it gently at first, then harder if you see she likes it. 

Pull her hair to control her head, to open her neck to you, to get her face to you, and so on. 

#3: Push Her Around Gently

Slam her (gently!) to the wall/table/floor. 

Force your knee between her legs, spreading them, showing her that you’re in control over her and her body.

Lift her, push her towards the wall as you rub on her, letting her feel how hard and turned on you’re. 

#4: Take Control Of Her Masturbation

Force her to touch and please herself, but take control of what she’s doing and when she’s allowed to finish. 

Use some remote vibrating toys and control her pleasure this way, not letting her have a say in when and how she’s going to cum.

#5: Talk Dirty To Her

Don’t be shy here. 

Talk dirty to her, tell her things you’re about to do to her, tell her how you’re going to tease her until she begs for the release. 

Tell her how much she turns you on and let her feel like you’re worshiping her. 

Here are a few line suggestions if you’re out of ideas:

  • “This hot/tight ass of yours is all mine tonight.”
  • “Your body was made to be fucked by me.”
  • “Can you feel how hard you make me?”
  • “Look how wet you’re making your panties…what a dirty little slut you are.”

Medium Dominance

Was light dominance not enough? 

Well then try getting rougher with her:

#1: Scratch Her

Use your nails to lightly scratch her neck, back, and ass. 

Just make sure they’re clean before you do that!

#2: Bite Her

Bite and nibble on her body. 

Start at her ears, move down her neck, then the nipples, going down to her stomach and then her tights. 

Leave marks all over her body, as a reminder of who her body belongs to. 

#3: Spank Her

Slap her ass, then rub it and slap it again, leaving the mark. 

Tell her that her tight ass belongs to you and slap her again. 

Try not to do it too many times without a break in the same spot, unless she asks you to. 

#4: Manhandle Her

Use your strength to grab her ass, her breasts. 

Lift her and throw her on the bed, then push your body onto her, weighing down on her. 

Stop her from moving by pinning down and holding her hands, dominating her like that while you fuck her. 

#5: Deny Her Orgasms

Touch her sensitive areas, getting her to the edge, but never let her cum. 

Make her beg for the orgasms, tease her, and only let her finished when you’re satisfied with her torture. 

#6: Force Her Orgasms

Make her cum and once she does, make her cum once more. 

Touch her, lick her, fuck her, use toys if you have some on hand, and blow her mind. 

#7: Fuck Her With Her Clothes Still On

Don’t bother taking the clothes off. Pinn her to the bed, lift her skirt, push her panties to the side and fuck her hard. 

Once you’re done, tell her to wear her wet panties as a reminder until the evening or until you say it’s enough. 

#8: Restrain Her

Get some handcuffs, a tie, or a scarf.

Restrain her to the bed or anywhere else and do whatever you want with her body.

What other better way to dominate during sex than this?

Aggressive Domination

If she’s begging for more (consent is key!) and you really want to dominate her, then try some of these activities:

#1: Use Temperature Play

Get some hot wax candles and drip the hot wax all over her body. 

It will sting, it will hurt a bit, but it’s going to turn her on for sure.

Or use ice on her (let it melt a bit first)!

#2: Choke Her

Press your hands around her neck and squeeze it lightly. 

It’s a dangerous activity, so make sure you educate yourself first about the safest way to choke!

#3: Gag Her

Take the gag toy and shove it in her mouth. Combine that with handcuffs, and she’s all in your power. 

Don’t have the ball gag? 

Then use her lace underwear and shove it in her mouth; works just as good if not better!

#4: Force Her To Pleasure You

Force her on her knees and make her suck you. Tell her to look you in the eyes while she’s playing with your penis. 

Take control of her head and ‘face fuck’ her if she’s OK with it. 

Cum inside her mouth and tell her to swallow it all or cum on yourself and tell her to lick you dry. 

#5: Degrade Her

Degrade her with some hardcore dirty talk. Call her a whore/slut/bitch.

Make her feel like the only thing she’s good for is your own satisfaction and pleasure. Make her say it to you herself. 

#6: Slap Her

Use your hand or penis to slap her across her face. 

Do it if she disobeys you, as the punishment, or do it while you’re degrading her. 

Just don’t do it too roughly so that there won’t be visible marks later. 

#7: Make Her Submit

Make her your slave and force her to call you her Master (or Sir, Lord, etc.)

Give her commands, tell her what you want her to do and be. Punish her if she doesn’t obey you and reward her if she pleases you. 

Other People Tips, Tricks & Experiences

And now, let’s take a look at opinions and tips other people on the internet are sharing:

“Being restrained or physically controlled is my favorite.

Guy last week held my wrists together behind my back with one hand, bent me over and pinned my head down with his other hand while going at me from behind. Was very hot.

In general I like to be reminded that I’m a 110 pound weakling and they are a 200 lb beast.”


“Basically manhandle her. You need to treat her like your personal slave who can be used as you want. Light choking, slapping (especially spanking), things like calling her a slut and putting her into whatever position you want to fuck her in are standard.

My only caution especially if you’re young is to make sure to get some evidence that she is into it (video or text evidence). If things go too far and she suddenly feels like a slut then it’s easy for her to suddenly call rape. The first couple of times also avoid anything that might leave a bruise.”


“I define it as any time I let go and give the control up to the guy. (even if the whole thing is my idea). Usually involves dirty talk, then some slapping/choking/spanking/spitting, etc.

We just go with it. Every woman is different and sometimes you might think you would NEVER like something and then in the moment it’s the best. Being dominated is the time I can let go and not have to control the situation, its a way of letting go.”



And here you have it – your full guide on how to dominate a woman in bed like a pro. 

If you’ve ever wanted to give it a go and pleasure your partner by taking her control away, or you just want to switch things up a bit, now you know how to do it right!

Remember – honest communication is always important, and you should always listen to your partner if you want the best experience. 

Have fun!

Dainis Graveris

Dainis Graveris

With over 2 year experience working in a local adult toy store Dainis has gathered quite a bit of experience about helping people find the best for their needs. He's also a top writer on Quora (7M views, 2.3K followers) and has written over 70+ guides on SexualAlpha. Read More

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